I have been in a few relationships. There's a difference between boys and men. The difference is that boys wanna play and men don't shy away from responsibility. Unfortunately my relationships have only been with boys! Not men! I have been naive and fell for the boys whom I thought that I could fix. Although I know that you cannot fix anyone, and that you get what they are now. I thought it would be so much fun to teach them all the awesome things that I know and tell them about how to make their life better. Then I would watch as they seemingly changed their lives around from wrong to right, good to bad. In all reality, they were in the moment, caught up in bliss, and would not recognize what kind of a girlfriend they had until I was long gone. I always found it very exciting to be, "The one that got away." It made me feel mysterious and alluring. In the end, this was all just a game I played. I would not have been able to tell wrong from right, or up from down inside the walls of that game.
I honestly feel like I am worthy of a great man who has a car, a job, a house. I just do not know where to find a man like that. Where I live there's only rednecks and hippies, and I have faith that the man that I deserve is not in my neck of the woods! A piece of advice I hold dearly my grandmother told me, "If it is meant to be, it will be easy. It will just come to you." I will to take this to heart when looking for the man of my dreams. I actually will not look, because he will just come to me!
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